Mom’s Shining Moment

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Several weeks after Salem was born, I was still in the throws of postpartum depression. I looked like something out of The Shining. Clark insisted that I start taking a few hours a week to go out and do whatever I wanted to do so long as it didn’t involve any bridges or the operation of heavy machinery. (Looking back, I’m not so sure if that was more for me or for him. Day after day of watching your wife walk around like a zombie covered in spit up can start to mess with a guy’s head.) At first, I would park my car somewhere and cry because crying was my new thing. Then I graduated to have “tea dates” with myself. Soon thereafter, I figured that talking to myself in coffee shops was getting a little creepy, so I started to have tea dates with a few friends.  At first, I felt guilty for taking the time away from my son and leaving him home for Daddy to care for, but then I remembered “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy”, and I thought that getting out for some fresh air might not be a bad idea. It was tempting to try to squeeze a Wal Mart run or a trip to the cleaners in there without having to haul a child in and out of a car seat. But, I made the conscious effort to do only things that I actually enjoyed– exploring new fabric shops, cafes and book stores, or going for a long run along the river (ok that’s being a little ambitious– I don’t run and I don’t live near a river, but it sounds like something nice to do on a morning out– for some women). I couldn’t believe what a difference it made to get out and rejoin the human race for just a few short hours. It was fulfilling in a way that it fueled me to be what I needed to be at home for my family. Two kids later, it has become sort of a tradition in our house, and I look so forward to my time out every week. And of course, Clark has his own reasons for looking forward to my weekly outings.

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